Bridesmaids NOT Bride's Maids!... Bridal Party Etiquette

After watching a marathon of WE TV's hit show “Bridezillas,” the R&P ladies decided to address the issue of bridal party etiquette. Brides and grooms get the opportunity to choose their closest friends or family members to be a part of their special day, but many of them tend to take these people for granted. The brides on the show were seen cursing their friends, calling them fat, walking all over them and pretty much treating them as slaves. Even though your bridal party members will typically honor you by hosting the bachelor and bachelorette parties and paying for their own wedding attire, they are not obligated to serve you or be your "maids". Here a few tips to help keep the level of stress between you and your bridal party to a minimum:

1. Choose someone you know will be there for you. Don't choose your unreliable, on-again-off-again friend and expect him or her to change their ways just because it is your big day. Chances are, if you could not rely on them for support before your wedding, you won’t be able to rely on them on your special day!

2. Give a lot of thought to selecting your bridesmaids. If you have a serious problem with their appearance – their weight, hair, tattoos, etc. - DO NOT antagonize them by calling them names and belittling them. That only causes tension and leads to problems. If you feel strongly about having her in your bridal party, then just accept her the way she is.

3. Be up front with your bridal party. Let them know what you expect of them if they agree to be a part of your wedding, including their financial and time commitment. Ask them to consider their amount of time off from work, the cost of their attire, shoes, jewelry and hotel stay (if they're out of town), as well as their cost for hair styling and make-up (if you do not give it as a gift to them). Also, remind them to include the cost of the bachelor/bachelorette party, if they decide to host one. Give them enough time, before your wedding, to save up money and let them know exactly how much they can expect to fork out for the big day. That way, later on down the line, there should be no confusion.

4. Remember that the members of your bridal party have their own lives. Just because they agree to be in your bridal party does not mean all of their time will be devoted to you. They may have demanding jobs, families, and other financial obligations to attend to. Be respectful of that. Also, be understanding if they are not able to attend every meeting, luncheon, party, fitting, or event you ask them to attend.

5. Be kind to your bridal party. Everybody is different with different ideas, values and obligations. There may be something you may not agree on, but as long as you address every situation with a level head and open mind everything will work itself out. Don't think you're always right just because you're the bride, because that's just not true. Love and respect your bridal party and they will help make your wedding day as special as you hoped it would be!